PSA

I don’t know who needs to hear this today, but:

Women. You are NOT obliged to be any dude’s therapist just because he is sad and lonely. You are (of course) welcome to be nice and supportive if you genuinely like and want to help him. But if you have that niggly feeling in your belly (I think most women know the one I mean), you are totally allowed to just walk away. That niggly feeling is ENOUGH.

Dudes. If this seems to happen to you a lot, perhaps instead of deciding that all women are bitches, you should re-evaluate the way you interact with them. They are not responsible for your mental health. You are. Please stop expecting free emotional labour from women. Do some heavy lifting yourself.

This has been a PSA.

Imagine…

Imagine universal basic income is a thing. Your immediate needs are met. You have a roof over your head and enough money for food and utilities and the basics of living. Maybe even just a little extra for an occasional bottle of wine or lush bath bomb or whatever your fave is.

What would you do with your life? How would you spend your time if you didn’t have to graft to survive all the time?

Wolfenoot Patreon

FYI. I am doing a bit of a trial run with turning the Wolfenoot Patreon into more of a subscription service for sending people cool stuff. There are new tiers, but they are limited for now while I see what the implications on my life are.

If you’d like to support my efforts to turn Wolfenoot into a fully fledged organisation, this is the beginning of that. The goal of this is to help me turn it into a job so that I am able to put more of my time and energy into it.

And this way, you can get super cool stuff from us too. 

Dear White People…

There is something I want to say, and I am very afraid of saying it wrong but I think not saying it is worse than saying it wrong, so please read this with compassion and try to see the thing at the heart of it.

Dear white people. We need to do better.

We need to start making it so socially unacceptable and so uncomfortable to be casually racist that we wipe it out. People are no longer often racist around me because I am very vocal about my attitudes about it. When people tell racist jokes I look at them blankly and go, “Why is that funny?”. I simply don’t put up with it.

But I wasn’t always like this. I used to shrug, and smile uncomfortably because I didn’t want to “make a fuss” or “seem uncool”. Because yeah, the jokes are off colour, but they don’t do that much harm, do they?

The thing is they DO do harm. Because they grow into what happened yesterday. And the safest space for that harm, for those racist ideas to take root and grow taller is among other white people.

I see a lot of “This is not us”, and that makes me uncomfortable, because, well, it is. There is, and always has been, racism in NZ. It’s maybe not as virulent or obvious as in other places (Well, up till yesterday), but it absolutely exists. If you doubt this, ask any of your Maori or Indian or Black friends. And if you don’t have any friends of colour, well… you kind of just proved my point, then, didn’t you?

New Zealand is a beautiful wonderful place, and Kiwis are, for the most part, some of the nicest people I have ever known, and I have lived all over the world. But we are not immune. And I think that perhaps because of that bubble of safety we have constructed around ourselves, made of sheep and hobbits and fiords and jandals and TimTams, we let things slide that we shouldn’t, because we don’t see the harm.

Well, now we have seen the harm.

That harm grows in white spaces. If you let it slide, you contribute to it. And the violence is done to other people’s bodies and homes and lives. We need to start putting our white privileged bodies and minds between that harm and the people it gets aimed at, BEFORE it becomes fatal.

Teach your children better. Choose your friends better. Check your own language and jokes and attitudes. White people are raised in a cloud of casual racism, whether you see it or not, and we need to CONSCIOUSLY dismantle it, in ourselves and in each other.

This is not me saying that if you’re a white New Zealander, this was your fault. It is not that simple. But if you are a white New Zealander, I do think it is your responsibility to check yourself (I do, all the time), and then start making the space around you unsupportive of racist ideology.

Let’s suffocate this shit right out, with our love and our inclusivity.

As for all my friends of colour, my Muslim friends, my friends of Indian descent, my immigrant friends, I love you so much. This must be so hard for you. I can’t change the world all by myself, but I swear that the space around me will always be as safe for you as I can make it. If you need anything I can give, I am here.

Love NZ

Today we were driving home from town and some kids were playing rugby on a field and their ball flew off to the sidewalk.

A little old lady walking there, in a floppy fabric sunhat, picked it up, switched her cane from her right hand to her left and used her right to drop the ball into an astonishingly perfect dropkick back to the kids.

It was the best.

Then she switched her cane back and kept walking.

#hopelives #loveNewZealand

Christchurch. <3

I held myself together till I got home. Now I am crying and shaking and furious.

How DARE THEY come here to my place and fuck with MY PEOPLE. How dare they bring their toxic ideology to my home and hurt MY PEOPLE??

I don’t even care if they were born here and I wasn’t. I knew we had shitty racists, because shitty racists are everywhere. I didn’t know we had THIS.

I am furious.

And don’t you dare tell me to calm down.

And don’t you dare defend them.

Not here. Not in my fucking backyard.

You. Are. Not. Welcome. Here.

With your hate and your bullshit.

You know who is?

Literally everyone else.

This is not coherent but I’m so angry. I hope you know what I’m trying to say.

Ko-fi

Life is kinda kicking my ass at the moment. Sometimes it feels like I am being the whole internet’s Mom. It’s wonderful, but it’s exhausting, and it takes a lot of energy.
I would do this shit for free, happily, if I never had to actually worry about bills. But alas, bills are real. So.
If you’d like to buy me a virtual coffee, this is a good way to support any or all of my projects, and keep me caffeinated and slightly less stressed. 

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Teaching consent

*kid pats my bottom*
J: No, dude, it’s not okay to touch people’s bottoms without permission. And mostly, it’s not really even okay to ask permission.
C: Awww okay sorry.
J: Maybe one day you’ll have a girlfriend or a boyfriend and they will be okay with you touching their bum. But even then you’ll have to check.
C: Maybe I’ll have a wife.
J: Maybe you will. And she might let you touch her bum. But you’d still need to check because it’s her bum, so she’s in charge of it, just like you’re in charge of yours.
Touching bums is only okay in very specific circumstances. For now, it’s best to just not.
C: Okay. Hey, if I’m in charge of my bum, that means I’m in charge of my FARTS!

And that, ladies and gents, is how you teach consent. It’s really not difficult.
Also, when you’re nearly-8, everything comes back to farts. 😂😂

Zodiac Tales

I’m so thrilled to be working on a project with Min Minn, a talented artist who also happens to be one of my best friends. Those of you in the Critterverse may have spotted some of her art in the art reel and the art book.  I am so proud of her, and very excited that she has joined the Raven for our Illuminated Manuscript project.

We’ve collected 12 stories based loosely on the signs of the zodiac, and once a month will be releasing one of them, illustrated by Min in a kind of modern illuminated manuscript style. If you choose the physical one, it will arrive at your postbox in a beautiful sealed scroll.

Just a little bit of magic, once a month.

Come join us. 

01 (TEASER) [Illuminated + Dropcap] [Coloured] Bloodstone Delivery - Aries - Sierra July